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Magic Moments

The minute I heard it, I thought “Why didn’t I think of that?” It was just the other day during an amazing discussion hosted by Luminary. The moderator, Dora Herrera, President of Yuca’s Restaurants and Ashley Brundage, author of Empowering Differences were kindly answering my question on how we can help children channel their strength in order to have confidence in themselves.

Magic Moments is something a friend of Dora’s came up with to make sure her child had a way to open up to her. It’s described as magic so her young one becomes excited to participate in the activity whether it’s hiking or another mini-adventure. The real purpose, though, is to create a moment of togetherness that leads to sharing. Whether it’s talking about something positive —  or whether she’s struggling academically or with friendships.

Simple. Effective. Brilliant.

The benefits are many, including establishing trust and a feeling of safety.

The most common piece of expert advice that bullying prevention experts give to kids is Tell a Trusted Adult. Sound advice but although most of us are well meaning, what does it actually mean to be trusted?

You always want to ask yourself whether you’re actively building trust in them or whether you’re shutting your child down. — Esther Wojcicki, Educator, Journalist and Author of How To Raise Successful People 

A child trusts us when we’re:

honest •  reliable •  interested •  available •  good listeners •  rational

Sounds simple, right? I don’t know about you but a few things on this list are challenging. (OK, maybe more than a few.)

I’m sure I don’t have to go down the list to explain why. The overall answer is that life is sloppy and imperfect.

That’s why I’m a huge fan of the Magic Moments concept. It’s a built in way to practice all of the above. It’s making memories and getting to the heart of the child. Not every moment of every day can be magical. (I’m optimistic, not delusional.) But these moments add up to a child learning how to communicate, understanding they are respected and loved, how to respect others, how to become trustworthy themselves, and how to feel safe.

This is another reason I think parents are the most powerful people on the planet. You may think that you’re taking a little hike or going to the library, cooking up something in the kitchen or having an adventure in the park or backyard. The truth is, you’re raising superheroes who know how to trust that someone will be there for them. It’s a lifelong game changer.

In a blink of an eye, they will be the trusted adult who delivers magic moments.